Removing the Plank

by Meredith

Matthew 7:3-5 “Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

I love this verse because the example makes judging others so clear. Basically, you can’t correct someone when you have the same problem. I think this applies to me like when I correct E. in things I do too. An example is when he isn’t grateful. He will just complain and whine when nothing is wrong. I will usually just tell him to stop complaining and be thankful. But everyday, I also take things for granted. So I need to get my heart in the right place and have the right motives before I go and judge him. And I should be an example for him to follow Jesus.

It’s been pretty hard lately and we’ve all had some issues and lost our patience. But God’s been with us the whole way through and provided for us. The other day in church we talked about living for eternity and not being distracted by the things of this world. He asked, “What are you doing that will count for eternity?” I strongly think foster care is a great answer. Giving kids a home when they really need one. Of course there are many other answers and everyone has a different story, but this is also very important. And none of this is about me, my family, or E. All the glory goes to the Lord, and He’s adopted all of us into His kingdom. God will always be E’s father, no matter what happens, and there’s peace to be found.

The Good Stuff

by Paul

This fostering thing is hard in a variety of ways. We are daily praying through certain situations with E. and asking God for wisdom. Perhaps the hardest is the lack of certainty or direction when it comes to his long-term placement. It is a cyclical thing – many of his protection mechanisms have come from a complete lack of security and permanence; however, we can’t begin to fully address them until we can provide that permanence. Right now, our goal is to point him to the only true source of permanence, which is a lasting relationship with Christ – the One who will never leave him.

Here is some of the “good stuff” that we’ve experienced in our month with E:
• Getting all five of us outside of our comfort zones in ways we never imagined
• Seeing my family practice selfless acts of love in new situations daily
• A renewal of our family nights and bedtime readings
• Watching my daughters grow in wisdom, patience, and discernment as they handle two boys in the house who don’t always get along
• Listening to the laughter of “brother” camaraderie, especially at bedtime
• Watching Josh and E. use each other to advance their Lego craftsmanship
• Stealing precious minutes alone with Cathleen to catch up during the craziness
• Getting to help “unpack” seven years of baggage of abandonment, fear, uncertainty, and rejection
• Leaning on God daily for wisdom in dealing with “said baggage”
• Seeing baby steps of growth regularly and knowing God is at work
• Teaching both of my boys how to be a Godly man – how to honor God, respect women, be “others focused”, and lead well

In Psalm 40, David talks about how God “brought him up from the miry clay and gave him a new song.” In many ways, E. is stuck in that clay (the clay of isolation, the clay of insecurity, the clay of abandonment, etc.). Our prayer is that one day he will be able to sing how God rescued him and freed him from all of this “clay” in order to fully live!

Psalm 40:1-3
I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and He turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.
He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see what He has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.

Going the Extra Mile!

by Meredith

This verse was brought up in church today and really stood out to me:

Matthew 5:40-42 “And if any one wants to sue you and take your shirt, let him have your coat also. And whoever shall force you to go one mile, go with him two. Give to him who asks of you, and do not turn away from him who wants to borrow from you.”

God spoke to me in this verse by saying if E. is asking for something (attention, time, encouragement, etc.)- go the extra mile. If he asks for my shirt, to give him my coat also. For example, if he and Josh are screaming, fighting, or driving me crazy, instead of yelling at them to stop, I should be patient. And going the extra mile would be not only just keeping to myself with self-control, but trying to help them work it out. I’ve learned a lot since E. came to stay with us. Patience is something I struggle with daily. And God has been teaching me to enjoy each day and not worry about tomorrow. Another thing that has had an impact on me is that I can call E. my brother. In the beginning, I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to call him my foster brother, or my brother. But I soon learned that it was just when my heart was ready. I’m just going to trust the Lord with whatever obstacles come our way during this journey. And go the extra mile.

So much to say, but no time!

Joshua examining the old "Mentos in Diet Coke" trick - a classic!

by Paul
So much to say, but so little time. I'll work to compose my thoughts and get them on paper over the next week.

We continue to love unconditionally, speak truth in love, set boundaries as needed, and pray continuously that God would give us wisdom each and every day. We are still thankful for this stretching opportunity that God has provided for our family. A few fun pics....

Paper Mache Penguins!

Picking up Marian at Pine Cove Ranch

Our First "Family of Six" Pic

Joshua 1:9 - Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go."